A Tale of Two Balls

For those of you who normally read my blog you know that it is usually clean, fluffy, family fun. This, however, is an exception. Please be forewarned that the following post will contain some graphic language and subject matter not suitable to young children. You have been officially warned!
Last Thursday I was getting off of the freeway to go to Costco when I noticed the truck in front of me had a pair of testicles hanging off of the underneath of the bumper. Now I know that many people feel it important to plaster their cars with bumper stickers, or some truckers feel the need to belittle women by placing sexual silhouettes on their mud flaps, but seriously when did it become okay to hang your balls off you truck? I have actually seen this once before, thankfully neither time did I have my older children with me. I can only imagine the conversation that would have to occur after that! I couldn't help but wonder why on earth someone would do this, but I came up with three reasonable explanations.
1. The driver/owner did not actually do this, but rather it was a sick (and admittedly incredibly funny if this is the case) practical joke. Only this can explain why he doesn't mind a pair of oversize pale testicles swaying flimsily in the wind behind him.
2. The driver/owner has very low self esteem and is somewhat cowardly and placed the item on his truck so that upon entering and exiting his vehicle he could remind himself that he does have balls and he can face the day. If this is the case, I feel incredibly sorry for you little truck driver and hope that you can find some self help tapes to encourage your spirit rather than balls that hang off of your truck that make you look like you are greatly overcompensating for your own lack of balls.
3. The driver/owner of the truck fears that some day he may lose his balls, and therefore needs to continuously have an extra pair on hand. And, bonus, by hanging them off the back of his truck he knows they will be nice and dry if ever he needs to switch them out.
I wish that I had had the balls to follow this driver and give him a piece of my mind. Maybe I could have borrowed his?